As the car fell down the cliff, a deafening roar resounded, followed by bright red flames. Cao Dingkun’s memory was frozen at the moment of impact and then it went blank.
At this moment, he was staring tiredly at the strange, slender left hand that he had raised. The skin on this hand was white and tender. A slender hand covered in thin, horizontal, pale wounds.
Cao Dingkun could only repeat a sentence in his heart over and over again: This must be a dream.
Ten minutes ago he had come to this strange place, struggling to sit up in a bath filled with blood. A blood-stained blade fell onto the tiled floor next to the bathtub. Hot water, razor blades, scars and shallow blade wounds. Despite the shock, he assembled all of this information and came to the most rational conclusion – he had committed suicide.
But he was sure that the explosion after he fell from the cliff and the series of clashes with Su Shengbai and Xu Zhen prior to that were not hallucinations. He was also very certain that even if the sky was to fall down he will not choose to take his own life. Further, from the past to the present, he had never had such a thin body or fair skin. This quality was unique to Su Shengbai, and Cao Dingkun was a tall man with multiple scars and well-developed muscles.
When he saw the familiar face in the mirror, he knew he was caught in a conundrum.
Luo Ding, another member of the two-member idol group in which Su Shengbai had debuted, and a former print model. Other than his outstanding appearance, he was inconspicuous in character and temperament.
In order to rescue Su Shengbai from this unpromising idol duo, Cao Dingkun had once learned some information about Luo Ding which he had promptly forgotten. Cao Dingkun had no patience for people he did not care about. But now, in order to fully accept Luo Ding’s dim memories, he had to work hard to digest this man’s bland life. Perhaps this was God’s retribution against him for his arrogance.
A half-filled bottle of Prozac had been placed on the bedside table. Cao Dingkun traced Luo Ding’s memories to find a pass book which was in a locked compartment of the bedside table. As he could not clearly recall a password to open the lock, he randomly smashed the lock with the lamp stand to open it.
Luo Ding had been depressed, and after living in isolation, his depression had developed into a severe communication phobia. In Cao Dingkun’s own memory, Luo Ding was a silent and indifferent person. Unlike Su Shengbai’s bright and agile tongue, Luo Ding was always quiet and appeared like an outsider in all occasions. He couldn’t communicate and couldn’t grasp opportunities and whether innocent or not this character trait was a fatal flaw in the entertainment circle. After meeting him twice, Cao Dingkun had surmised that Luo Ding had no future in entertainment. In addition, Su Shengbai had informed him that he had a conflict with Luo Ding. Thus, Cao Dinjun’s ass acted as his head and he had left this unremarkable guy behind.
Cao Dingkun smiled softly as he quietly criticized his past actions in his heart.
In fact, today, after reading Luo Ding’s memories, Cao Dingkun realized that Luo Ding had been in a relationship with Su Shengbai in the past, hence the “conflict”. Did his brain malfunction? For Su Shengbai, a mere child in his twenties, to lead him around by the nose. Had the vision he had honed for over forty years been eaten by dogs?
This Su Shengbai was “very good”. An immense ruthlessness was required for Su Shengbai to first be capable of stabbing Luo Ding in the back and then to not even hesitate in sending him, Cao Dingkun, to his death while concealing his true character so well that no one was aware of it. When he was in his twenties, he didn’t necessarily have the fierce means and ability to not blink while holding a steering wheel and ramming another person’s car down a mountain cliff.
To not be successful with such a personality was truly unreasonable.
Cao Dingkun lay on the edge of the bed, the vertigo caused by excessive blood loss made him want to vomit. In his forties he had lost his life’s work. Be it fame or his status in the industry, it was all going to be hidden away by mud, just like his car which had fallen down the cliff face. However he had never expected that in the end God would pull him, a bereaved dog back, allowing him to change his body and continue to live.
Tears gathered in his eyes as he laughed and stared at the fine cuts on his wrists. Like a slideshow in his head, frame by frame he saw his life. Friends, lovers and loved ones all were a joke. He had given all he had for them and lost everything, even his pants.
Sure enough, no one should believe in others in this life, believing in yourself is the only truth.
Su Shengbai and Xu Zhen. How would such materialistic people ever believe for a moment that he could regain his life through another person?
Cao Dingkun smile slowly, patted his chest and tried to regulate his breathing, the thick anger in his eyes, a mismatch with his melancholic appearance.
A sudden knock on the door echoed in the quiet room. Three loud successive knocks roused Cao Dingkun from his thoughts.
“Who is it?” he uttered, as he reached for the bottle of Prozac on the bedside table, throwing it into the trash can, and standing up expressionlessly.
“Who else could it be? It’s your grandson! Ancestor, can you please open the door!?” As Cao Dingkun’s footsteps approached the voice coming through the door, memories crashed through his mind like a raging wave, nearly killing him.
He endured the headache and turned the lock to open the door. Sure enough he saw a pale fat man with blond hair standing in the doorway. This man was about a meter and seven inches tall, and his countenance would have shown his kindness except that his nondescript appearance had been combined with a very flamboyant and trendy style.
Wu Fangyuan was a man Luo Ding had attached a lot of importance to in his memories. He had grown up together with Luo Ding at the orphanage, and when Wu Fangyuan found that he could not get along with his former colleagues, Luo Ding hired him as his assistant when he debuted. In fact, it is unusual for a young and unpopular celebrity like Lou Ding to have his own assistant but Wu Fangyuan did his job well. He knew that Luo Ding was depressed and as such worked to help Luo Ding organize his life. The relationship between two was therefore more like close friends than that of working partners.
“Wu Fangyuan,” Cao Dingkun stared at the man and sighed. From now, he would start over in this new life from the very beginning.
For a moment, Wu Fangyuan froze when he saw Luo Ding, yet he couldn’t put a finger on why he felt a sense of incompatibility. However, in the very next moment, his attention was diverted by the other’s abnormally pale face and his bare feet. He patted his thigh in very exaggerated manner and glared at Luo Ding with an expression of hating iron for not becoming steel: “Luo Ding! Why have you turned yourself into a ghost? Why is your phone off?”
Luo Ding (t/n: Cao Dingkun) thought of the soaked mobile phone lying beside the bathtub, and replied, “Broken.”
He stepped back to allow Wu Fangyuan to enter the house but Wu Fangyuan became even more anxious: “Ancestor, why do you always let me down? How many jobs do you receive every month? President Gu intends to focus on promoting you this time. He has arranged for you to attend this audition with Hu Xiao. Even if you don’t like the idea, in order to earn your keep you cannot be absent! If I hadn’t arrived early to call you, did you plan to hide in there all day? Are you not being unprofessional?
Luo Ding had never thought of work at all. It was not worth it to him. This was probably the biggest difference between him and Su Shengbai. Although Su shengbai was of poor character, to succeed, he would definitely seize every opportunity to climb up.
Luo Ding chose to pretend that he didn’t remember: “Oh, I forgot.”
Wu Fangyuan’s showed that he expected this response, he took a glance at the room and sighed, his current headache no less Luo Ding’s.
“Ancestor, go and change your clothes, I beg you, I am kneeling and begging you!” Wu Fangyuan put his hands together before Luo Ding in a humble and worshipful gesture, he wanted to cry without tears.
Seeing that Luo Ding didn’t move, he raised his head silently to make a comment, but froze instead.
Luo Ding was frowning and looking down at him with an expression Wu Fangyuan had never seen before. The emotions in his gaze were complicated and indecipherable. The young man he had grown up with obviously had the same facial features but at this moment, it was strange, but he seemed like a completely different person.
Before Wu Fangyuan snapped out of his daze, the door shut against the tip of his nose and with that, he gained back his reasoning.
Wu Fangyuan tilted his head thinking furiously, he couldn’t come up with any adjectives sufficient to describe Luo Ding at that moment. An imposing manner? … no! It was more than that. Aura?… No, that’s not entirely correct either.
He was bewildered, his eyes widening, blinking in doubt.
Luo Ding mixed a cup of salt and sugar in water and poured it in the bathtub to clean up the blood, he picked up the blade, threw it into the trash bin, picked up the broken cell phone and then finally stood in front of the washstand.
As the dim light over the toilet area illuminated his reflection, he smiled and touched every corner of his face.
He looked at Luo Ding’s nose, deep melancholic eyes, naturally smiling lips, a thick pair of eyebrows, and a small face that could be covered by a palm.
Though there are a lot of handsome men and women in the entertainment industry, it had to be said that few looked as good as Luo Ding.
It’s no wonder that a person with such a flawed character could nevertheless join an entertainment company. Obviously, It did not matter that he had no strong talents, just exposing his visuals was sufficient … Concerned that he would be regarded only as a pretty vase? Not to mention putting in any effort, as long as he smiled the level of the show will be raised by a grade.
It’s a pity that such a good seed had been buried for so long.
Luo Ding smiled and straightened his body, forcibly dispelling the violence in his eyes little by little.
“Since we both were once played by Su Shengbai, I will give you a reckoning. You did not cherish this life, but I consider it a treasure. I will take care of your friends and relatives. As you have given up this life, I would not be so disrespectful as to decline it. “
Luo Ding patted his chest and vowed silently in front of the mirror.
Wu Fangyuan recalled the strange feeling Luo Ding had given him a moment ago. This short period of waiting felt more and more like a year. In just half an hour the doormat in front of the door was almost worn through by him.
The door opened suddenly and Wu Fangyuan was startled, almost letting out a shriek. That exclamation was stuck in his throat and he wordlessly, stared at Luo Ding, who was tugging on his hair, with his mouth agape and his entire body frozen.
Luo Ding sported a simple white shirt and gray linen pants, yet he looked like he was covered in a halo. Only three buttons on the shirt were fastened and his pale white chest was exposed, and it was difficult to ignore his slender neck and elegant collarbones. Luo Ding frowned and tried to push up his bangs which were about to cover his eyes. Each motion was eye-catching.
Wu Fangyuan took two steps back and felt that his brain had malfunctioned.
He stuttered and said, “… Luo, Luo Ding?”
After half a second, Luo Ding realized that he had been called. He glanced at Wu Fangyuan and hummed emotionlessly.
His slender eyelashes cast a fan-shaped shadow on his skin. Wu Fangyuan covered his mouth and promptly forgot what he wanted to ask.
 Referring to Cao Dingkun
 To feel anxious towards someone or something for failing to meet expectations and being impatient to see improvement.